Thursday, April 1, 2010

Girls are Cows

I am going to try to tell a series of hilarious conversations that occurred between me, my 7-year old nephew Dillon, and his dad Wayne. For any of you that know Dillon and Wayne, I'm sure you might be able to picture this happening. This may be embarrassing for me to tell, but I think it's hilarious and since I would be the only embarrassed one, here goes. I'll try to do it justice. These may not be exact words, but as close as I can remember.

When were walking around the tidal basin in DC checking out the cherry blossoms, I stopped to take a break with Charly. I sat down on a bench to nurse her. I, of course, was appropriately covered with a nursing cover.
Dillon sits done next to me and says: Whatcha doing?
Me: I'm feeding Charly.
Dillon: What are you feeding her?
Me: Milk that my body makes for her.
Dillon looking at me skeptically: Really? How?
Me: Its the way Heavenly Father made mommies so we could feed our babies.
Dillon, with a sly grin: That's not true. Your not telling me the truth.
I laughed, then he walked off and I continued to nurse Charly.

Later, Wayne (Dillon's Dad) told me about a conversation he had with Dillon. I can't remember the exact words, but the following is the basic idea.
Dillon asks him if I really have milk in me that the baby drinks.
Wayne: Yes. You know how cows make milk.
Dillon: Ashley has squirtters!!
Wayne: Well, not exactly ones as big as a cows, but kind of.
Dillon: What? Girls are cows!?!?

Then that night, I was again feeding Charly.
Dillon says: So, I don't believe you are really feeding that baby. My dad says you need to show me where the milk comes out.
I burst out laughing and can't stop. Dillon waits just staring at me, I think waiting for me to "show" him. Not gonna happen.
Nice Wayne, real nice.


  1. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Classic... and not really at all surprising... I think I knew from the beginning (as I know Wayne) where the story was going and I couldn't wait to read it. Wayne did not let me down:)

  2. I hurt from laughing right now. I can totally picture this happening! Totally classic Wayne-Dillon moment!

  3. The part that cracked me up was that Dillon acted like the anatomically correct name for a cow's udders is "squirtters" - ROTFL!

  4. Lol! I threw my back out two days ago and it hasn't hurt as bad as right now b/c I am laughing so hard!!! I too think the funniest part is the term "Squirtters!"

    I can so see Wayne saying "tell her to show you!"

  5. Seriously, SO FUNNY! Oh that dillon... where does he come up with some of this stuff?! Oh yeah... his dad! Squirtters is just haliourious.